@ZombieMom_Speaks -  I do, as best I am able and as both of us are permitted by the vow of obedience I’ve taken and the one she is preparing to make! Currently she is doing her canonical year which has heavier restrictions on how many letters she can receive/write, but after August we should be able to write a bit more frequently. It is tough, but I get updates about her from one of the other sisters whom I am in contact with regularly. But even more importantly we keep in touch through the Eucharist. We know each other so well and love each other a great deal, and so even though we are miles apart and haven’t seen each other for over a year now we know how the other is going because we know that we both love Christ, and He is the focus of our lives. Since we have the same focus, the same center and in many ways the same heart, well, we just know how the other is doing. I am hoping to see her in August, God-willing!

But she is preparing to get married, and not merely to a man but to Jesus Christ; she’s getting ready to be radically, totally His. So it is proper that there has to be a distance in our friendship and that He would take pride of place in her life! So I don’t mind taking Second Place to the Jesus who holds First Place in both our lives! If that means I need to get out of His way, even if it means I suffer a little for it, I don’t mind at all; He suffered so much for me first. Besides, she is SO happy, and I am happy for her. To be able to be her friend when He came courting her heart, to be able to encourage her, to pray with her and to stand beside her when her family wouldn’t support her in her decision, to be the one person in her life that knew and understood this call she was hearing in her life, what a gift! I wouldn’t trade this for anything, even if she lived next door and we could visit every day!

@uglygreensofa -  Well, after all, the charism of my order is to be universally available to the Church for whatever her needs might be. It takes a while to train a man to be able to do pretty much anything! Not that after that time a Jesuit CAN do everything and anything, but he has had such a good education and such a diverse array of experiences in ministry that he’s extremely versatile. Many college students in St. Louis would tell me, “11 years; that’s such a huge commitment!” to which I would reply, “Yes, and so is marriage!” Their jaws would drop and they’d say, “Wow, I never thought of it that way…” and I would say, “Well, I’m glad we had this conversation.”

A Jesuit has two years of novitiate in which he learns about the history of the order, its ways, spirituality and prayer, etc. You also have part time ministry (I helped out at a grade school across the street) and lots of time for prayer and community life. You also do a thirty-day silent retreat, five-weeks living with and ministering to the infirm somewhere in the region, a 30-day pilgrimage in which you have $30, a one-way bus ticket to your starting destination, a phone card and a backpack with some clothes and then you are out the door on your own, and usually the summer is filled with various workshops and things to continue learning. The second year is similar in that you have a part-time ministry and continue learning about the way of life but also start learning about the vows of poverty, chastity and obedience. You also spend five months living and working with Jesuits somewhere in the US, though international missions aren’t unheard of (I spent mine on an Indian Reservation in Wyoming). After the summer you make your First Vows of poverty, chastity and obedience.

The next three years are spent studying philosophy for the most part, though there is a little theology mixed in. You continue with a part-time ministry of some kind as well, and usually your summers are spent on mission doing something. I helped out at a summer camp in Ontario my first summer, then I was a hospital chaplain (inTENSE!) and then I was sent here to Milwaukee to begin my assignment early. After philosophy and the like you are missioned to three years of ministry with other Jesuits, and this usually entails teaching in one of our high schools though that is not a hard-and-fast rule. Currently I am living with and ministering to about forty of our retired men here in the Milwaukee area, helping them with all sorts of non-medical stuff (we have aides and nurses for that) and just trying to help them live as active and normal a life as possible. This coming fall I will start teaching at our local high school.

After this period of apostolic work we are sent to study theology for three years, at the end of which we are ordained to the priesthood. Some men are permitted to continue studies after this point and many do pursue Ph.Ds in all sorts of things, but I’ll just have a Masters in Divinity. Really it all depends on what kind of ministry a man is going into and what gifts he has; the Jesuits are a very, very diverse order and we are doing just about anything you can imagine.