Other than being my birthday, September 29th is the Feast of the Archangels (Sts. Michael, Gabriel and Raphael). I had a thought during Mass today, “Why did God even create angels in the first place? Couldn’t he just do all their work himself?” I knew the answer to the second question to be, “Yes, he could.”

I thought further on the first question and decided that God would never do something himself if he could, instead, ask someone else to do it for him, that they may receive the gift of serving God. If God did everything himself, he would deny the opportunity for anyone else to serve the God they love so much.

For example, back when I was young and in love oh so many years ago (ha!), I jumped at any opportunity to serve the woman for whom my heart beat. Can you imagine, then, the joy an angel must experience when it is missioned by God or asked to do something for him? Can imagine St. Gabriel’s joy when God asked him to deliver a certain message to Mary?

So it seems to me that he created angels because he is so giving that he wished to reserve nothing for himself, save for being God (an important thing!). He didn’t create the heavenly host because he is a huge bum with lots of power and a disdain for sweat, but because he knew the joy that others would experience in serving him and he wanted to give them that opportunity.

Our God is so loving and so giving that he deigns to act upon the world through the choices and actions of his creatures, of angels and humans, because he knows how much they wish to serve him out of love. As his servants rejoice in serving him, he shares in their joy.

My two or three cents on it anyways.

Ten years ago today, on September 25th, 1999, I, BrowneyedGirl1017, and one of our brothers received the Sacrament of Confirmation in our home town parish. I don’t remember too much of the preparation classes we had to take that summer, except for free pizza and picking out a patron saint.

I remember also being a little nervous in meeting the bishop but, finding him to be a humorous and light-hearted man, that tension was quickly done away with. I remember his crosier, a big wooden one that a relative had made for him, and I remember my godfather being my sponsor, and how much older he seemed to look from the last time I saw him. I remember very clearly the smell of the chrism (olive oil), mixed with balsam.

While the day in itself was pretty special, I didn’t really think much about it after that, as I imagine many Catholics who are confirmed don’t. It just seemed like one of those things that your parents make you go through.

I am so happy that I was made to go through it, though I didn’t understand what was going on.

While there is certainly theology and Church teaching behind the Sacrament (of course!), I just wanted to share with you my personal experience of the graces I have received so far, at least those that I have been aware of.

In 1999 I was a high school sophomore, just getting ready to really fall in love for the first time (here). As those of you who read about that in an entry from last year and then the entries following, that started off a whole chain of events that brought me, in its way, to where I am today. I am so grateful that, albeit without me realizing, that I had the graces of Christ through the Sacrament of Confirmation working within me to lead me along the path God wished me to walk, as difficult as it was at times. However, I gained another companion who helped me in surprising ways: St. Gregory the Great.

When I was preparing to receive the Sacrament, we were asked to pick out a patron saint. When we are confirmed, there is a tradition that we are confirmed with the name of a patron saint, a role model of sorts that we would look up to as an example of how to live our lives as Christians. Many girls, for example, pick St. Joan of Arc, like my sister BrowneyedGirl1017 did. At the time, I was very big into music, being very fond of playing the tenor saxophone in band and fancying myself to be a “true musician.” I also fancied being a professional musician, even classical (since at the time I held that classical music was the only real music, a view that has since matured considerably), though I did not realize how meager the prospects were for “classical saxophonists.” Nevertheless, I aspired to pick out the patron saint of music. Can you even imagine my disappointment when I discovered this saint to be the lovely but girly St. Cecilia? Granted, I love her greatly now, but at the time the thought of being confirmed “Cecilia” or, worse, “Cecil” got all my boyish nerves in a bunch. So, settling for second-best, I chose St. Gregory the Great, the patron saint of singers (Gregorian chant, anyone?). I figured that a singer is a musician, and I’m a musician, and music is universal. So, Gregory. Fine. Better than St. Hubert, which my brother went with and I teased him about, until I found out that St. Hubert is the patron of hunters and has a very cool conversion story.

The teasing ceased.

So I was indeed confirmed “Gregory,” and then forgot about him. Sometimes when I was really nervous in high school choir I would ask him to pray for me, but that was about it.

It is funny to think about my views on singing while I was in the latter half of grade school (6-12 grades). When I was very young, maybe fourth or fifth grade, I remember singing at Mass one time and after we were missioned to “go in peace to love and serve the Lord,” my sister turned to me and said, “You sing like a girl.” (Sister, don’t feel bad; we cannot regret the things we said to each other so long ago and so young!!) However, even though I never really took anything my sister told me in those years seriously, that one for some reason cut me deep, and I never really sang alone in front of anyone ever again, unless made to in choir rehearsal. I hid in the group, sang my part, and deflected the compliments of my classmates and choir instructor with polite thank yous and “well I’m not that good.”

It wasn’t until I was at the Newman Center in Laramie, Wyoming and started going to the joint Catholic/Lutheran praise and worship gatherings that I started to sing and not be too self-conscious about it. From that small degree of freedom came the increased freedom of singing to my girlfriend, who adored it (and mourned the fact openly that she couldn’t sing herself, though she loved musicals), and when her mother heard that I could apparently sing, she asked me if I would sing her a song someday, something that I never did and sometimes would like to do, if I had the chance to see her again. But, water under the bridge (several bridges, gosh, five years now!).

When I was at the University of Northern Iowa, I got involved with the Mass choir at the student center there and a weekend came up when a cantor was unavailable and, somehow, I was asked to do it.

“Umm… ok?”

Terror!!

I was so nervous; not only was I asked to solo in front of a few hundred people, but being a cantor is different from being a soloist performer; it is a ministry. You are helping to lead the prayer and worship of everyone present, you are helping to enrich it. When we as Catholics sing the “Sanctus” (Holy, holy, holy Lord, God of power and might, heaven and earth are full of your glory! Hosanna in the highest! Blessed is he who comes in the name of the Lord! Hosanna in the highest! Is. 6:3 and Rev. 4:8), the song is prefaced by the priest who says, “And so we join the angels and saints in proclaiming your glory.”

No pressure!

So there I was, getting ready to sing the psalm. The cantor sings the antiphon, which the people echo, and then sings the verse alone, signaling to the people when to repeat the antiphon. Repeat. The antiphon that day was, “This is the day that the Lord has made. Let us rejoice and be glad!”

Looking out into the crowd I scanned desparately for a familiar face, and I found one- a high school classmate who I had sung with many times in choir. So I focused on her and everything went fine. Phew!

I received many kind comments for my singing that day, but took none of them seriously. I of course thought I was horrible!

But then a year later I was encouraged to try out for the university choir and, somehow, was chosen to be in the top two choirs on campus. I also began taking voice lessons and, to my great surprise, unearthed a treasure trove of vocal gift that I never realized I had. (story here) As I transitioned to novitiate and beyond, I have come more and more to love singing, and when I took this to prayer and looked back on my life, I can definitely see how the Holy Spirit has been working through me ever since receiving that “boost” of grace in the Sacrament of Confirmation, and I know that St. Gregory the Great has been praying for me non-stop since that day I picked him or, rather, Our Lord picked him for me. As a priest, I know that this gift will bring a lot of joy to many people and will help them to pray. Thank you, Jesus Christ, for the outpouring of your Spirit upon me!

So as a thank you to Him and to share the gratitude with all of you, I wanted to post a recording of me singing, “How Can I Keep From Singing?” which in itself is a motto for my life. For “if Christ is Lord of heaven and earth, how can I keep from singing?” Please pardon the quality; it isn’t like I had a professional studio (instead my bedroom), and I haven’t been able to do any high-quality choral work for a few years now. So my voice isn’t in top shape, but, people still enjoy it. I hope that you do, too, and God bless.

PS- for any Catholics commenting here, I would LOVE to know your Confirmation saint, if you chose one, and why!

Note: All those little dots are people at World Youth Day in Cologne; this is not a work by Georges-Pierre Seurat!

I just HAVE to post this; I hope I can finally go! What a testament to the Catholic faith that not only can millions of us from around the world gather in peace, but cities and countries are willing to host us! Has anyone here ever been to World Youth Day?

(From catholic.org)

MADRID, Spain (Zenit.org) – The archbishop of Madrid says he’s preparing to welcome some two million young people for the 2011 World Youth Day — half of whom are expected from outside Spain.

Cardinal Antonio Rouco Varela spoke with the Spanish daily ABC about preparations for the youth event. The preparations were officially kicked off on the feast of the exaltation of the cross, with the beginning of the pilgrimage of the World Youth Day Cross and icon through the archdiocese, and throughout Spain.

The cardinal affirmed that the sites for the main activities with the Pope are already confirmed: the Vigil and closing Mass on Aug. 19 and 20, 2011, will be held at the Cuatro Vientos airport, and the opening Mass to welcome the Pope on Aug. 16 will be held at the Plaza de Cibeles.

A solemn Way of the Cross is also being considered, to be held Aug. 18 on the Paseo de la Casstellana.

Cardinal Rouco Varela observed that World Youth Days “have conditioned the history of the evangelization of the world’s youth” by helping to create “a distinct youth culture, fresh air for young people’s lives in their environments and ecclesial groups.”

He continued, “For thousands of youth, they have meant an encounter or a re-encounter with the faith; others have discovered their vocations; and all of them have caught sight of ways to be young, to want to live with dignity, with nobility and with clear horizons.”

Under way

The cardinal explained that the organizing committee is already at work, collaborating with the Spanish episcopal conference.

The committee has already approved the official logo and theme song, and is coordinating catechesis sessions in more than 300 language groups.

According to initial data, more than 1,000 bishops are expected to attend, as will half of the Church’s cardinals.

Families of Madrid will be opening their homes to accommodate pilgrims, though the cardinal acknowledged that this won’t be sufficient to house all of the pilgrims. Thus, every ecclesial institution has been asked to provide every available space, and regional and local government offices have received the same request.

Cardinal Rouco Varela noted the “magnificent response” to this petition, and the “absolute availability.”

Finally, the archbishop mentioned the financial cost of the event, affirming that the majority will come from “private contributions and donations from the faithful.” He also said that there is a need for 15,000 volunteers in the six principal language groups.

“The tradition of the Church in Spain,” the cardinal concluded, “will be a grand and positive novelty for youth from many parts of the world, where the Church is very young, where the great Christian past is languid, or the reality of the contemplative consecrated life that so much attracts youth of our time is not as vigorous as here.”

This is a view from the main entrance of the Cathedral Basilica of St. Louis, just down the street from where I live in the city with which the magnificent building shares its name.

I was attending the 12:05pm Mass here with maje_charis on Thursday and though I have attended Mass here many times over the last year, I was struck seemingly for the first time by this often looked upon but never-before-seen (much like the difference between hearing and listening) depiction of the crucifixion. Looking in the center of the above picture, you can pick out the stark, white marble of Christ on the Cross. Here is a closer look:

This scene depicts Christ on the Cross, with his mother Mary on our left and the disciple John on the right, as is mentioned also in the Gospels that the two were present there with Him.

Anyways, it struck me first of all how moving this really is, in particular when I considered it during the Eucharistic Prayer…

In memory of his death and resurrection, we offer you, Father, this life-giving bread, this saving cup. We thank you for counting us worthy to stand in your presence and serve you. May all of us who share in the body and blood of Christ be brought together in unity by the Holy Spirit.

Lord, remember your Church throughout the world; make us grow in love, together with Benedict our Pope, Robert our bishop, and all the clergy.

Remember our brothers and sisters who have gone to their rest in the hope of rising again; bring them and all the departed into the light of your presence. Have mercy on us all; make us worthy to share eternal life with Mary, the virgin Mother of God, with the apostles, and with all the saints who have done your will throughout the ages. May we praise you in union with them, and give you glory through your Son, Jesus Christ.

During the Mass I began considering that, in such a depiction with Christ, His Mother, and His disciple, I could see represented the Body of Christ in three ways that not only existed then in that actual event nearly two-thousand years ago, but exist yet today in mystery, by the power of the Holy Spirit.

I. This is my body, which will be given up… for you…

Particularly in the starkness of white marble, we can see Christ’s body; the Body of Christ in the most obvious sense of the phrase. God took on human flesh; the bodiless now had a body, the formless had form. Quite a mystery indeed. But where do we see this reality today? For we say in the creed that He sits at the right hand of the Father. Yet, he said he would be with us until the end of the age.

We have the great mystery of the Eucharist, his Body now “true food” and his Blood “true drink” (John 6), separated in the appearance of Bread and Wine as his Body and Blood were separated on the Cross.

II. Stabat Mater

When a woman bears a child, it seems to me, that her body becomes the child’s body. It not only is from her own body that the child receives their own body, her blood by which the child receives their blood, but also it is through her own body that the child first experiences the world, moves within it and is known. For many people, their first encounter with the child is the beautiful, round belly of the mother, full of life.

Likewise was Mary the Body of Christ, even before he had his own body. By the Holy Spirit was he conceived within her; to think that the infinite God, creator of the universe, was once microscopic within the womb of Mary! Also she was the first disciple of Christ, his first follower. Though as his mother she was his teacher, she also was instructed by him, even from his first moments. Remember all that Gabriel revealed to her at his conception, and remember the lesson the infant Jesus taught her when she went to visit Elizabeth? “Mother, I am the hope of the world!” And she sang for joy with a song that will echo through the millennia to come, and truly, “all generations call her blessed.” So as a follower of Christ, as we are, she was our first glimpse into what would later come to be known as the Mystical Body of Christ.

III. St. John Christendom (a pun, if you are clever)

This is when we come to St. John.

It seems to me that in St. John we see the only one of the Twelve that did not abandon our Lord. We see a man who began as a disciple, was chosen as an apostle and never once left our Lord’s side, not even in the darkest hour. He is united in love, the very Spirit of God, to Jesus Christ, a singular image of the Mystical Body that we witness today. Also in becoming Man, Christ shares a common humanity with St. John and all human beings. When St. John and the other apostles receive the Holy Spirit in the Upper Room, they already shared a common humanity and then came to share in a common divinity; a complete likeness to Christ, being God and Man. As the formless, bodiless God took flesh and became Man, so does this mystery continue in the Mystical Body of Christ, through the Holy Spirit we receive at Baptism. Really, at least in this artistic portrayal, that is not only St. John standing at the cross, but each and every Christian.

IV. Altogether Now

We come back to Mary.

Just as we see in Mary the very vessel that bore God throughout the world, the Ark of the New and Everlasting Covenant, just as we see how she cared for, revered, instructed, loved, mourned and rejoiced in the physical Body of Christ, so do we see the Marian mystery in the Church today, and here again we must mention St. John and his role in representing the Christian.

From his place upon the Cross, Jesus said, “Woman, behold your son,” and then to St. John, “Behold, your mother.” (John 19) It seems to me that, knowing his own body was about to give way to his Mystical One, Jesus (being God) entrusted the Virgin again with the task of caring for his Body in its infancy, charging her with a sort of spiritual motherhood. So also is the Church a spiritual mother, for within her each human being is born into Christ’s body through baptism. So, too, do her priests and bishops teach us and raise us, along with the other faithful, so are we healed in the anointing and laying on of hands, cleansed in confession, and most importantly fed with the Body and Blood of Jesus Christ, becoming further united with Him and with each other, the Body becoming more and more truly one, as He is One. Like Mary in her pregnancy, it is the Church that is Christ visible in the world, the Church through which Christ moves and interacts in the world, and too his Mystical Body when we are born into the Church through our baptism and are sent by Christ to, “go in peace to love and serve the Lord.”. As Catholics, we not only see the Church carrying on the role of Mary, but we believe that Mary carries on that sacred mission entrusted to her at the cross from heaven still today. But that is perhaps a blog for another day.

So the next time you are at Mass and you see the priest elevate the broken Host above the full cup, remember that you are witnessing our Crucified Lord, “broken for you,” that you might have life. The next time you walk by your parish or another, think of your Mother Church and all she has done to care for you, as Mary did her Son and does now by her prayers and through the grace of her Son. The next time you gather with your Christian brother or sister, remember St. John at the cross, standing at our Lord’s side, inviting all of us to come and worship him who gave everything for your sake and calls all to communion with him. As he was there, so are we there, and so are all invited to come, no longer afraid because unlike the one who betrayed him and the ten who fled him, we now have what St. John had- the consolation of the perfect mother, and a love of Christ that will endure all trial.

For, “[w]hat will separate us from the love of Christ? Will anguish, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or peril, or the sword?… No, in all these things we conquer overwhelmingly through him who loved us(Romans 8: 35 and 37).